All About Me Letter Essay Example for Free

All About Me Letter Essay My favorite sports are football and basketball. I play the recorder. I participated in football for three years and basket ball for one year. I played the recorder for one year in the fourth grade and earned all the belts for each skill level. On the other hand I don’t like to read what so ever, but I’m going to improve my reading this year. I don’t like to read because I fall asleep as soon as I begin to read books. The books that I like are adventurous and action-packed books because they interest me so I won’t fall asleep. These kinds of books stimulate my imagination and help me visualize the story. In order to keep me interested in reading I would like to have audio or graphics books. I did great academically last year as I made A’s and B’s. My academic goals this year are to make straight A’s and to receive scores above 900 on the CRCT. Considering that I do not like to read, it’s hard for me to brainstorm ideas and write an essay. Therefore, I do not think of myself as a good writer, as I prefer digital images to awaken my creativity. The few times that I must write, I like to write narratives about my family vacations in new places. Narratives allow me to express my emotions. Unfortunately, brainstorming ideas causes me to have headaches that turn me off from writing. I hope to learn how to overcome this obstacle and improve my writing skills. In conclusion, you can help me achieve my academic goals by suggesting some action-packed or adventurous book titles for me to enjoy reading. I learn best by following examples and listening to instructions. The activities you can help me with are reading and sentence-structure in writing assignments. I welcome the opportunity to learn from your expertise. Sincerely, Phillip Harrington Phillip Harrington

Hyperactivity And Add Attention Deficit Disorder Psychology Essay

Hyperactivity And Add Attention Deficit Disorder Psychology Essay Hyperactivity and A.D.D. Attention Deficit Disorder is a common diagnosed behavioral disorder that begin early in the childhood.Even though considered a childhood disorder once,it is now much more clear that many of the children that has ADHD will continue to have it when become adolescents.While the symptoms decrease as a function of age,impairments like academic,social and family are observed to increase in adolescence.The disorder have unclear biological underpinnings,it is stressfull to live and get over with,and places burden and cost on family,school and society. Although having a varying array of degrees and types,the effects are roughly the same.Struggling while acquiring new relationships and keeping them,having hard time on concentration on tasks makes academic life and career tougher,probable communication problems based on being unable to self expression and facing the sometimes harsh results of acting without thinking. With its causes are variable and not exactly known,they are roughly related with the genetics,environmental effects,extraordinary conditions occuring during the development of brain.Psychological or medical treatments are available,of course,and former of which are usually the first choice while the latter is for more intense cases with heavier symptoms.Other treatments include academic, and behavioral interventions. 1.1: Hyperactivity and A.D.D. is a common seen case at people,starting from childhood.It is not a disease,it is defined as a behavioral disorder by the health experts,while the psychiatrists define it as a neurobehavioral developmental disorder. It should be noted that being Hyperactive does not mean being less qualified,insomuch that,considering most hyperactive people have higher IQ rates compared to other people.This means these individuals can be,and are actually as qualified and as intellectually potent as everyone,or even more.The purpose of this report is to analyze the reasons of the causes,symptoms,results and alike conditions that this disorder causes in the individuals lives. In order to examine the subject,it is first needed to be understood the reasons,types,their differences and specialties.Then it must be gone through the results and treatments.In addition,the patients with ADHD will be regarded as hyperactives or hyperactive individuals,during the rest of the report. 1.2: Being considered as a behavioral disorder by the health experts,ADHD is also defined as a neurobehavioral developmental disorder. It is a common disorder that starts during childhood,however,it does not only effect children.People of all ages can suffer from it,and backing that up,it is observed that the symptoms of ADHD keeps asserting themselves in the adolescense,too. ADHD makes certain things harder for the one who is bearing it,like making it more difficult to focus on things for a long time without distraction.Patients also struggle controlling what they are doing or saying,and also have harder time on controlling the frequency of their physical activities,compared to somebody without ADHD.To say in other words,hyperactive individuals are more impulsive and restless. Being in close relationship but not to confused with autism,there are other disorders it may be related to.Backing that up,ADHD is also associated with many other conditions including learning disabilities, conduct disorder, anxiety, mood, and substance abuse disorders. States M. Simonescu,from State University of New York. Some other trivial information about ADHD is that it is known and defined in different names by different experts or countries.For example,in North America the term ADD or ADHD is commonly used to express the situation,while in the UK Hyperkinetic Disorder (HKD) is the special term.Health experts may use one of the following,in order to specify those with disorder; attention deficit, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, hyperkinetic disorder, hyperactivity. 2.1 Types Symptoms There are three diagnosed types of ADHD so far,which are Predominantly Inattentive Type, Predominantly Hyperactive-Impulsive Type and Combined Type.For any of them to be diagnosed certainly,patient must show at least 6 out of 9 of the symptoms which are specific to the each type: Predominantly Inattentive Type symptoms include: Not paying attention to detail Mistakes due to carelessness Failure to pay and keep attention on task Not listening Unability to follow and understand any instruction Avoiding effort involving tasks To be distracted a lot To forget things a lot Losing objects that are needfull to complete the tasks Hyperactive-Impulsive Type symptoms include: Fidgeting Squirming Getting up often when seated Heavy physical activity (running,climbing) in inappropriate times Having trouble playing or tasking quietly Talking excessively and impatiently Interrupting And as the name may suggest,combined type consists of both inattention and hyperactivity-impulsivity symptoms.For a certain diagnosis,symptoms must be observed for a consistent six months,and to a greater degree than other children at the same age. 2.2: Results at Real Life Most people display some of these symptoms and behaviours,but it is not always to a degree where they interfere with their lives significantly.And due to this absence of significance,a diagnosis of ADHD is not precise and appropriate.Some people with ADHD experience considerable difficulties with social and academic skills,such as forming or keeping relationships or keeping proper work and attention during their careers.Moreover,most of the child patients experience rejection and exculsion by their peers,compared to 10-15 percent of the healthy children of the same age.A significant rate of adolescents are observed to have difficulties during the process of non-verbal and verbal communication. 2.3 Causes 2.3.1: Genetics Studies show that,in about 75 percent of the cases,genetics are a factor and the disorder is also highly heritable between ancestral genes or by the gene pool. 2.3.2: Executive Functions Significant amount of symptoms arise from a primary deficit on Executive Functions,which refers to cognitive processes that regulates and controls other cognitive processes.The most obvious examples of it are planning,working memory,attention,inhibition and mental flexibility. 2.3.3:Evolution For more than 1 percent of population,researchers stated that high generality of ADHD may be due to natural selection,probably because the individual traits might be beneficial on their own and only became dysfunctional where these traits combine to form ADHD. 2.3.4:Environment Environmental factors usually contribute a small role to the origins of ADHD.Exposure to tobacco smoke or alcohol intakes during the pregnancy may impair the development of nervous system which can end up with a diagnosis of ADHD.Environmental lead also remains as a valid factor,since former studies at relatively high levels of lead exposure showed that the exposure and low levels of IQ as well as attention problems,other disorders such as autism or hyperactivity. 3 Conclusion As a common case,hyperactivity has many effects on patients who bear it,though it does not pose serious threats or problems for health. It only could make life a little harder,in social and academic senses,but that does not mean that it is completely bad and hard to live with it.Majority of hyperactive individuals are reported and observed to have higher IQ levels and creativeness compared to those who arent.They also think and act differently,making them outstand from the crowd,usually in a good way. Commenting and acting differently when encountered extraordinary situations is mostly applauded by ordinary people,due they can and do come out with extraordinary but appropriate solutions. However,this little disorder can be treated and reduced,even though it can not be completely removed,but then again,since it does not have harmful effects on human health,it is not necessary.But then,having a more stable mind and physical stand and postur emay help individuals get more friends easily,acquire succesful relationships,and most important of all,a more succesful academic life,in senses of education and career. One should not simply stereotype or confuse hyperactive individuals with mental patients.It can be both a bless,and a curse,and it completely depends on the perspective.After all,they are just as human as we are,maybe a little more restless,reckless and impatient.But again,there is nothing wrong with standing out of the crowd,in a good way,and without even trying that hard as the rest of the other people. Referrences http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/info/adhd/ (n.d.,Retrieved in 6 May 2013) Richard S. Kingsley,MD What is ADHD ?,Reviewed in July 2012,retrieved in 6 May 2013 John H. Ferguson,MD National Institutes of Health Consensus Development Conference Statement: Diagnosis and Treatment of Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Conference Held in 16-18 November 1998,Retrieved in 6 May 2013 John H. Ferguson,MD Journal of the American Academy of Child Adolescent Psychiatry (Volume 39,Issue 2,February 2000, Pages 182-193) Retrieved in 6 May 2013 J.T. Nigg,Oregon Health and Sciences University Lead and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity (2011,Encyclopedia of Environmental Health pages 405-411) Retrieved in 7 May 2013 K.M. Antshel,State University of New York Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (2012,Encyclopedia of Human Behaviour,2nd Edition,pages 218-223) Retrieved in 7 May 2013 S.V. Faraone,State University of New York Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (2012,Encyclopedia of Human Behaviour,2nd Edition,Pages 218-223) Retrieved in 7 May 2013 K.M Antshel,SUNY-Upstate Medical University,Syracusa Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (2011,Encyclopedia of Adolescence,pages 56-61) Retrieved in 8 May 2013 R.A Barkley,Medical University of South Carolina Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (2011,Encyclopedia of Adolescence,pages 56-61) Retrieved in 8 May 2013 SPECIAL THANKS TO www.google.com Google Translate translate.google.com NESCAFÉ and MONSTER ENERGY for providing easier sleepless nights.

The Tyger Essay -- essays research papers

â€Å"The Tyger† Ana Melching Does god create both gentle and fearful creatures? If he does what right does he have? Both of these rhetorical questions are asked by William Blake in his poem â€Å"The Tyger.† The poem takes the reader on a journey of faith, questioning god and his nature. The poem completes a cycle of questioning the creator of the tyger, discussing how it could have been created, and then returns to questioning the creator again. Both questions about the tyger’s creator are left unanswered. William Blake uses rhythm, rhyme, and poetic devices to create a unique effect and to parallel his theme in his work â€Å"The Tyger.†   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  William Blake’s choice of rhythm is important to his poem â€Å"The Tyger† because it parallels the theme of the poem, that the tyger may have been made by god or another harsher creator. Most of the poem is written in trochaic tetrameter as can be seen in line three, when Blake says, â€Å"What immortal hand or eye.† This rhythm is very harsh sounding, exemplifying the very nature of the tyger. Some of the lines in the poem were written in iambic tetrameter, such as in line ten, when Blake says, â€Å"Could twist the sinews of thy heart? .† Iambic tetrameter has a much softer sounding beat than does trochaic tetrameter. This implies the gentle nature of god, and if he could create such a beast. The last word of each quatrain is written in a spondee. This h...

The Representation of Tone in The Turn of the Screw by Henery James Ess

The tone of a novel is defined as a way for the author to express his/her attitude toward such story elements as characters, setting, or situation. Tone is present in every novel any author’s writes, as it is this literary device that sets the mood of the story for the reader. Henry James uses tone very effectively in the novel, The Turn of the Screw. The story begins with a joyful and dreamy mood to frightening and furious in the middle and finishes with sorrow and mournful in the end. The shifts in tone are caused by the changes in attitude and actions by the governess. In the beginning of The Turn of The Screw, the tone is very joyful and dreamy. The story begins with Douglas and friends all telling each other scary stories. It is very peaceful and everyone is enjoying the stories being told. The tone is very joyful as represented by â€Å"Is n’t anybody going? It was almost the tone of hope. Everyone will stay!† (James, 6). This shows that everybody is having fun telling each other scary stories and are willing to stay and wait to here the story from Douglas. It was very hopeful as the stories being told were pleasant for the people around the campfire. The tone remains positive at the beginning of the governess’s story. The governess arrives at the house and sees this beautiful girl who is very polite and is too good for her own self. The governess is very happy that she was able to get the position for the job and to experience all of it that she believes that it is almost a dream. This is shown when she says such a place as would somehow, for diversion of the you idea, take all colour out of story-books and fairy-tales†(James, 16). This proves that the governess believes that everything such as Bly, the place in which they are s... ...clusion, the mood represents that the governess has truly given up on the children and is very sad that nothing else can be done to help them and get rid of the ghosts that are haunting them. In conclusion, the shifts in actions and attitudes of the governess cause the tone to shift throughout the novel. The tone begins with being joyful and dreamy to furious in the middle and mournful in the end. This all concludes, that the literary device tone is very effective in portraying the mood of the story through the characters actions to the reader. Tone is perhaps one of the most important literary devices author’s use to connect the mood of the story to a reader’s heart and really makes them feel for the characters and what they go through. Works Cited James, Henry. The turn of the screw and other short fiction. Bantam classic ed. Toronto: Bantam Books, 1983. Print.

migration Essay -- essays research papers

The need to migrate from lower developed countries to developed countries is generally due largely in part to financial reasons. In most cases, the attractiveness of higher wages in urban environments usually outweighs the inconvenience of being away from family members and becoming acclimated in a new environment. In lower developed countries, under-employment is high and the demand for labor is low. As such the problems arises with rural to urban migration. This migration into urban cities is usually an attractive alternative for individuals with low education levels, generally with limited experience in the agricultural sector. Initially at first, an individual may feel uneasy since the risk factor involved with migrating into a different environment is high and the likelihood of finding a job is uncertain. As much of a concern as this may be, the willingness to take this risk and migrate is usually a better alternative than staying in the current environment with insufficient infrastructure with limited job opportunities. The role of government policies also plays a large role in affecting the level of migration into a country. If the government can increase the perceived probability of getter a job sooner, even more people would migrate from the rural sector to the urban sector. This being so, the same would also be true for the opposite scenario. Should the government fail to implement policies that would increase the level of perceived probability, the amount of peo...

Black people in the USA in 1945 Essay

Blacks in the USA in 1945 were not considered as equal; the treatment of people was based on their skin colour, a practice that had been going on for many years before, even after the Reconstruction of society after the Civil War in which the blacks were â€Å"liberated† from slavery. In theory, blacks were free to work and live where they wanted, but the figures at the time told a different story: by 1960, around 17% of the workforce of â€Å"white-collar† workers, i.e. professional, technical, administration, etc., were blacks, while the whites remained the majority at 47%. The â€Å"blue-collar† work, such as craftsmen, manual labourers, etc. – jobs that are renowned for needing less skill and education – had 40% of the workforce as blacks, and 36% were whites. Blacks just weren’t provided the education and qualifications to do the professional types of work due to separation of black and white facilities. Not only were they held back at g etting the higher-class jobs, they were paid less for the same work that whites did; in 1950, blacks earned about 53% of a whites wage. This figure remained the same over the next 20 years, with it rising 11% to blacks earning 64% of a whites wage. All over the USA, blacks were discriminated against in almost all areas of life, whether it is the law of the state, or just by the custom of the local society. After the abolishment of slavery, slaves had the choice of moving away from their former homes and having their own lives; unfortunately, many blacks didn’t have any money to move halfway across the USA to the northern states that had fought to free them. Those who did have the finance to travel rarely had enough money afterwards to sustain a good quality of life after they had moved. The custom of de facto came into play in some of the Northern states; ghettos and places where the majority of the population were black sprung up in towns and cities. Segregation by custom in the North was contrasted with segregation by law, or de jure, in the South- Jim Crow laws forbade blacks, for example, to enter white facilities, or sit on buses with whites, etc. Places where de facto was in force came up with other ways to separate blacks from whites to keep the Southern order of things; â€Å"red lining† was when banks were not allowed to give money for mortgages if they suspected it would be a risky investment- if a black family moved into a certain area, it would lower the prices of the surrounding houses. This  meant that places such as ghettos were built up, when the majority of the population were black. This type of segregation wasn’t by law, but by custom, blacks weren’t forced to live in â€Å"black† areas, but they felt pressured to live in certain places because of the practises such as red lining in effect. Although it is in the Constitution that everyone is equal and has the same civil rights, it is beliefs like red lining that push a wedge between races; it may not seem constitutional, but it is up to the Supreme Court in the USA to decide what is constitutional. They decided that slavery was lawful mainly due the fact that the Southern states economy was based on slavery; they were needed to produce cotton, the main export in the 19th century. Without them, the economy would have fallen apart. After the 13th amendment to the Constitution, slavery was no longer legal, but the Supreme Court still remained to overlook state laws that continued discrimination and practices that could be seen as worse then slavery- for example, the Ku Klux Klan were allowed to terrorise and lynch blacks, yet lynching was not made illegal. â€Å"The Supreme Court declared that the 14th amendment forbids states, but not citizens, from discriminating† (1) Separate facilities for blacks and whites were considered as the solution to the discrimination problem; the Supreme Court believed that the blacks were â€Å"separate but equal† when they were forced to use different buildings, transport, schools and hospitals then the whites. Since the Supreme Court approved laws and could declare them unconstitutional if they wanted to, they were the ones who the blacks has to convince if they wanted to change anything; in legal cases, the trial had to be taken to the Supreme Court to have any impact, since the State Courts were always going to be in favour of the Jim Crow laws. The Plessy vs. Ferguson (1896) case was when Homer Plessy refused to sit in the â€Å"coloured† car of a train and sat in the â€Å"white† section instead. The case went to Supreme Court, and they ruled that Plessy was guilty and sentenced him to pay a fine or go to jail. This was considered the most shameful ruling of the Supreme Court in history; it shows the extent of the discrimination against blacks, even after slavery was abolished- even though Plessy was 1/8 black and 7/8 white, he was still considered as black in the eyes of the Louisiana law. Although many people thought that this ruling was  shocking, there wasn’t much that could be done, since they did not have a definite leader to show them what the do; everything that the movement did was relatively unorganised, with maybe one person leading the others. People such as Martin Luther King Jr. and Booker T. Washington tried to unite blacks under one leadership, but it did not work, because everyone has different opinion on what should be done about the discrimination problem. Dr Martin King Jr. was a black leader that advocated peaceful resistance; because of this, many whites accepted him because they knew that he would not cause violence, but blacks did not like this as peaceful protest could only take them so far- they felt that King was weaker then some of the other extremist black leaders, such as Malcolm X. King’s approach to fighting against their oppression wasn’t enough to keep the blacks following him; they preferred people who were willing to do more for the benefit of all blacks. Another leader who was thought as weak by fellow blacks was Booker T. Washington; he was accused of being an accommodationist to the whites, as he wasn’t campaigning for equal civil rights, he was concentrating on equal job opportunities- this wasn’t what the blacks were fighting for; they wanted to be free to do what the whites could do, not only in jobs but in other aspects of life too. The leaders of the movement were not united, therefore they were not strong- many leaders were critical of others, for example, W.E.B DuBois criticised Washington, saying that blacks cannot get social equality if they do not get political equality first. The New Deal is a phrase used to explain the actions taken after Black Tuesday when the US Stock market crashed to stop the effects of the Depression disturbing the lives of the public. Laws were passed to help stop the consequences of the Depression becoming a long-term problem; within the first hundred days, President Roosevelt passed a law that lowered worker’s salaries and pensions by up to 15%- a move that people did not like, yet it saved a lot of money for the government. Another act was passed that stated that the government could inspect banks before letting them open again so they could see if the bank was eligible to lend and hold money. This prevented banks lending out money that they did not have, therefore they did not losing money for their customers and wouldn’t have to close, as they  would have to have done if they did lend out money they didn’t have. The New Deal was produced so the government could help all of those that were affected by the Depression; this helped the blacks because they were some of the poorest people in the USA at the time, and as many as 8% of blacks were unemployed in 1955. For the blacks, the New Deal slightly improved their way of living as it was designed to help everyone without discrimination. Soon after New Deal was set up, the situation for blacks was improved socially by the outbreak of the Second World War. When the Americans were brought into the war, they needed as many men as they could to fight; blacks had regiments where they could join and be equal to whites, but they still were not allowed to belong to the same regiment as the whites- there were some who did, but they were rare, they normally belonged to an all-black regiment. At the end of the war, the blacks got more ambitious; they were allowed to fight for their country, but America wasn’t even grateful enough of them to let them be equal. This would have enraged African Americans since they had fought so hard to be a part of America, so the Civil Rights movement activity increased, which put pressure on the government to do something. The Nazi ideology also pushed the government into action, because what the Americans were doing to the blacks could be compared to the Germans discriminating against the Jews in Germany; the blacks realised this, so demanded equality, as they didn’t want the same to happen to them . In conclusion, the position of blacks in 1945 was not equal to whites: even after a century of supposed â€Å"freedom† from slavery, blacks were still treated as inferiors to whites. Laws and acts were in effect that encouraged the discrimination of blacks. Amendments such as the rights for blacks to vote and the rights for them to be equal were passed, but there were so many other laws that cancelled them out. Jim Crow laws in the South and practises such as â€Å"red lining† in the North made it impossible for blacks to be seen as equal politically, whilst rebellions by extremist whites and groups such as the Ku Klux Klan stopped blacks gaining any social standing or equality. Blacks were supposed to be equal, but by 1945, some may comment that the position of them was worse then slavery, as the blacks were on their own in  there poverty and discrimination; before, they had their slave owners who would clothe and feed them to keep productive workers- they would never be out on the streets as slaves, but as â€Å"free† people, they received basically no help. Things that whites took for granted, such as clean and good-quality facilities, and jobs that are fair and just are things that blacks counted themselves lucky if they managed to get any equality. People like Martin Luther King Jr. and W.E.B. DuBois tried to get equality, both through violence and peaceful means, but it didn’t have much effect to the political and social standing of blacks. The discrimination of blacks continued right into the 20th century, even up into the 21st century. It was slow going for the blacks’ right to equality, but actions by both blacks and whites ch anged things for the better. However, in 1945, blacks were not considered as equal, but as 3/5s of a human being. Bibliography: (1) http://www.alternativeinsight.com/Reparations-Slavery.html Field, Ron; â€Å"Civil Rights in America 1865-1980†; Cambridge University Press http://www.lawbuzz.com/can_you/plessy/plessy.htm http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Deal

Tim O’Brien “How to Tell a True War Story”

The words, which describe the character: Rat Kiley; sharp gray eyes; tight little strokes of the wrist; he wanted me to believe; big gentle killer eyes; little crazy; they were kids – they just didn’t know; Rat almost bawls writing it; they were like soul mates. The words, which do not describe the character: crazy in a good way; real daredevil; nineteen years old and it is too much for him. The guy’s real name was Bob Kiley, but everyone was calling him Rat (O’Brien 174).He had lost his friend Curt Lemon in Vietnam, but this loss happened beyond any military actions, when they were playing with grenades (they were real kids); Rat had actually lost his soul mate. Reading the story, Rat’s character created an impression of being flat. However, coming to the story’s end, it is evident that huge sufferings are hidden behind the childish behavior. This childish behavior has indirectly become the cause of tragedy, and suffering through this loss, Rat reveals his round dynamic character.He tries to forget his pain, but the fact that he feels it is the sign of his deep soul, which was changed in the cruelties of the Vietnam War. Curt Lemon is the character around which Rat’s actions and thoughts are concentrated. They spent most of their time together and what they felt towards each other was real kinship. The unexpected loss was so difficult for Rat that he didn’t hesitate to mail a letter to Lemon’s sister. This letter has become the expression of his feelings, his sorrow, and his best memories about that person. Re-writing the story from Rat’s perspectiveThe day didn’t predict anything tragic. We crossed the river – the mountains were in the west, and we had to direct our efforts there. We have already spent three days marching, and it already seemed monotonous†¦so well†¦we were trying to entertain ourselves, and in a second Curt Lemon was dead. He simply stepped on a boob y-trapped 105 round. One second – and the man was gone forever. We were playing, we were laughing, and then, out of sudden, he was dead. I didn’t notice that the whole hour had passed before we cut off the thick grass for the emergency helicopter to land.Surprisingly, the day didn’t change; the weather was the same, and we kept marching. The only thing was that Curt was not with us anymore. Higher in the mountains I’ve noticed a baby VC water buffalo. I had no idea how I could come across it so high in the mountains, and it was probably unexpected for me, that at that moment I could think of anything else besides Curt. I managed to get a rope around the baby buffalo and to lead it with us to the village, where we had to stay for the night. I stroked the baby buffalo’s nose, I tried to offer it come pork or beans, but it didn’t seem interested. I shrugged but I felt, how enraged I was.At that time I didn’t understand, what caused those feelings inside me, but now I know that Curt’s death had made me angry; angry for being incapable to change anything and to return him to life. I shot the buffalo through the front knee. I was shocked at the animal not showing any sign of stress; it didn’t cry. It was silent, though it fell hard onto the ground but then got up again, and at that moment I shot off its ear; I kept shooting and I could see it hurt, but for some reason I could not kill it. I would never make it suffer, but something inside me was preventing me from shooting right.I had no idea what others were thinking, but they were definitely watching each move and each shot I made. I was the only one to know, what it meant to me – Lemon was dead and he had been the best friend in the world. I am not sure whether it was a question of pain, and what pain one may mean here. I didn’t know whether physical pain could be measured or even compared to the moral pain I felt. I could not understand what I was doing, it was all smoke and I hardly remember whether I had shot the buffalo’s tail; it was as if I were dreaming. I shot it into the throat.I didn’t want it to experience those physical tortures anymore. I can still remember its eyes – enormous, shiny, and dumb. I can remember myself crying. I wanted to say how sorry I was for both the buffalo and for Lemon, but tears didn’t let any word come out. I understood I needed some freedom, some silence and some time to think, to try to recover and to ultimately feel better. I left the baby, may be it was still alive, but I didn’t know it. I just knew that it was fighting for its life, the chance which Lemon didn’t have. It will remain my sin forever, but my pain was enormous to hide it inside.I don’t still understand for whom I feel worse – for the baby buffalo I’ve killed or for Lemon who didn’t have a single chance to survive. What I know for sure is that Lemon didn’t go through the pain, which baby buffalo felt before it died. I also understand that this death could become neither physical, nor moral compensation for Lemon’s death. This is what I think now†¦ At that time I was not thinking anything. The baby buffalo’s death remains my biggest weakness – the inability to keep emotions inside. Later that week I wrote a letter to Lemon’s sister to tell her what a great guy her brother had been.I have written several funny stories from our life – I think that the letter turned to be very personal, even touching. I was almost bawling, because I could not accept the fact of his death. He had been the man able to turn the war into fun. He was right for war, and his attitudes towards war were also right. I clearly understood and I really felt that I would never receive any reply from that young girl, but I needed that writing to release my emotions and express what I was feeling about Lemon. Ev en when I pretended being angry at her, and called her â€Å"dumb cooze†, it was nothing but a mask – I didn’t want anyone know that I could feel†¦Justification I decided to focus on Rat Kiley’s character. The author emphasizes his negligent attitude towards life. â€Å"Listen to Rat: â€Å"Jesus Christ, man, I write this beautiful fucking letter, I slave over it, and what happens? The dumb cooze never writes back† (O’Brien 175). What I think is that Rat didn’t even expect to receive any reply from Lemon’s sister; he needed this letter to express what he had inside, and simultaneously he had to support his image of a guy â€Å"nineteenth years old – and it’s too much for him† (O’Brien 175).I was interested in viewing the story through his perspective, because I initially felt Rat could have been depicted differently, less crazy and more humane. As a result, the events in the narrative would loo k different through Rat’s perspective. After Lemon was dead, Rat could not find himself. He did not know how he could neutralize the moral pain he had inside. Again, the author could lead the narration in a different direction. Rat was shooting the baby buffalo – â€Å"it wasn’t to kill; it was just to hurt† (O’Brien 179).Has anyone thought that Rat might have not clearly understood what he was doing? The fact that he was crying was the best proof that his actions had been absolutely uncontrolled. Moreover, his negligence has proved to be only surface – he was deeply suffering through the loss of his friend; at his nineteen years he could consider himself happy for having experienced the kinship he felt towards Lemon. My goal was to portray Rat through different features, not the features which the author used in the narration. I suppose that the author has not looked too deep into Rat’s soul.O’Brien has created an image of Rat ’s cruelty towards the animal, and the readers perceive him as â€Å"a little crazy†. Simultaneously, he has not emphasized many features which make Rat a real human. Even the scene of animal killing could have been depicted differently, through the prism of Rat’s moral sufferings. â€Å"Rat Kiley was crying† (O’Brien 180), and that cry was the difficult acknowledgement of the fact that Lemon would never come back. Works cited O’Brien, Tim. â€Å"How to Tell a True War Story†. Postmodern American Fiction: A Norton Anthology. P. Geyh ed. New York: W. W. Norton, 1992, 174-183.